When the wildfire came too close to our home, we had minutes to leave. The sky was dark, the air heavy, and my phone wouldn’t stop dinging with messages from neighbors: We need to evacuate. It’s coming fast. We loaded what we could into two cars, a blur of clothes, papers, photos in arms reach,…
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In the summer of 2012, the mountains I love taught me something I didn’t want to learn. We were at a swim meet under a hot, bright sky, the bikes were on the back of the car for an afternoon ride, and my phone started buzzing with the same question from different friends: Can you…
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There are seasons in life when everything feels like forward motion – doing, fixing, planning, managing, helping. For many years, that was how I measured progress, my own, and others’. If I was moving, I must be okay. If I was doing something to help my son, maybe we’d both be okay. But there comes…
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For a long time, I thought the only way things would get better was if my son changed. If he just stopped the problem behavior. If he just got into treatment. If he just stuck with it. spent years waiting, watching, holding my breath and believing that my peace, my stability, even my worth as…
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Every September, the nation recognizes National Recovery Month. This year’s theme – Home, Health, Community, and Purpose – couldn’t be closer to the heart of what I’ve learned in my own journey. Because if there’s one truth I know, it’s this: addiction never affects just one person. It weaves its way into every relationship, every…
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Writing It Down Was the Hardest Part I have a book coming out on September 9th. Even just writing that sentence brings up a wave of emotion. Because the truth is, putting this book into the world is the most public, most vulnerable thing I have ever done. It’s not a memoir, though my personal…
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I Am Not OK, and That’s OK This support group theme from a few months ago hit home recently in a way I didn’t quite expect. “What am I if I am not OK?” That question doesn’t just live in the intellectual space for me; it lives in my bones. It’s a question I’ve wrestled…
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For the past three years, I’ve been quietly, and sometimes obsessively, watching the Big Bear eagle family, Jackie and Shadow, from afar. Their nest, perched high above Big Bear Lake, has become one of my favorite places to visit, even if only virtually. This year, their eaglets Sunny and Gizmo pulled me in like never…
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When someone you love is struggling with substance use or mental health challenges, life can start to feel painfully small. Relationships drift. Hobbies gather dust. The things that used to fill you up fall away, one by one, until all that’s left is a relentless focus on fixing someone else’s pain. For a long time,…
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For so long, your life has been moving at full speed. Every day felt like an emergency, every phone call a potential crisis. Your thoughts were consumed by one goal: getting them into treatment. And then, it happened. They said yes. They walked through the doors. You exhaled, maybe for the first time in years.…
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